I love my kids, I mean I LOVE my kids. I really feel lost whenever I'm without either of them. Sometimes I go out with friends for a ladies night or whatever but during the majority of the evening I am thinking of my husband and my little ones. its not that I feel like they can't make it with out me or anything, I just really enjoy them and I don't want to miss opportunities to be with them and JM.
So, reality is that however much I adore these bundles, I still get frustrated and I have moments where I just want a little space. So today, as i sit here during the silence of nap time with my only companion the occasional flip flop of my lovely 3rd child, I am reminded of how life gives us no promises. God gives us promises but we have no guarantee of tomorrow. I just finished reading a blog of a friend of mine who lost her son during early labor and my heart is devastated. How does a family, who are completely excited and prepared to bring a new life into this world, handle the news that their baby, who they haven't yet met, has passed away? I don't know how a person moves on from that. I think of our bundle of fun on the way and I can't even let my mind wonder to the land of what-ifs. I can't comprehend life with out my little Zaya and Bean. So today I am reminded to live for the moments I have with my kiddos. To let Zaya wear what she wants and play the games she wants even if it makes a mess and if she has an accident, no worries, she'll potty train before she gets married, I'm sure of it. I need to let Bean get rambunctious and make a little extra noise and so what if he doesn't eat a good lunch... he won't starve and I need to just hold him if he wants to be held... he may not want to cuddle much longer. I also want to embrace being pregnant and find joy in this new life unfolding within me. I don't really enjoy being pregnant but today I will love it! I need to love every moment of my kids no matter what stage they're in... they are treasures intrusted to me and JM for a short time and I want to take it all in and not miss a moment. Maybe no more girls-night-outs for me. I'd rather be with my family:)
My babies on the train at the square... this pic is completely typical of their behavior... I love them!
With Aunt Jeannie Poo and the barn to see the horses. They LOVED it!
PS- I think we may find out if our new addition is a boy or a girl tomorrow!!!
1 comment:
Thank you for this honest post. I needed to read this today. I needed to reminded to love. I needed to be reminded to take it all in... each phase... each day... and not stress over the mess or the crazy lunch or whatever... but just to treasure my kids and love them and make memories of and with them at this time and this age. I'm feelin' the love. Thank you again for your post and I love the pictures too!! Can't wait to find out what your having.......
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