This evening I was thinking about our little boy and thinking about the goodies he will get to use of IGN's when he arrives. We have all the 'baby necessities' thanks to big sister and those who hooked her up when she was on the way:) Here at Bethany a family has offered us a double stroller and I am PUMPED! It will make life much easier being able to roll them both around instead of carrying one in a sling or something and strolling the other. (Although I'm sure that will happen a few times.) I am realizing what an amazing privilege it is having TWO little ones in our house and I'm getting so excited. At first I was all nerves wondering what it would be like and knowing that it would be a challenge but the nervousness is becoming excitement as I realize that he's 14 weeks away from being here with us! I know it will be hard and I'm trying (if that is possible!) to prepare for it but more than anything God is confirming in my heart over and over again what a blessing my family is. I mean I can say that they are a blessing all day long but the Lord is stirring my heart for my family like He does a person for a people group or a nation. I think many mothers and women feel this way especially if the longing of their hearts was always to be a mom. It was never a 'passion' of mine to have a family and to be a stay at home mom so it has taken me longer than the average girl to get to this place. Don't get me wrong I have adored JM and my little angel but I never felt like this was my 'life's calling' and that what I was doing was bring glory to God and inviting the Kingdom of Heaven. (I hope I'm making sense.) But God is doing a new thing in my heart and showing me that where I am is where I have been called and serving and inspiring my family is the desire of my heart. Sometimes its easy to go through the days looking forward to nap times and feeling guilty because my house is lacking in cleanliness and beauty but all I have to say is that "its all gonna burn anyway" (quote from Caroline-thanks!) so why not put my time and energy into what is eternal and that is the spiritual climate of my house and the lives that are in it. No, I'm not going to let my house go to pot but if my girl (and soon my boy) need extra time with me, I'm going to let the dishes pile up for the day or let the kitchen floor have some extra crumbs on it. I LOVE my family and I am passionate about them and their spiritual well-being. I long to be the wife and mom that God is calling me to be. There are no pressures of this world that can tell me what we NEED to be a happy, healthy family, there is only the TRUTH of God and the revelation of the Spirit that will sustain us and give us what we need. I always wanted to be a worship leader somewhere in my heart and now I realize more than ever that I am, I have the honor of joining with John Mark and leading our family before the throne of God every day. I am blessed and humbled that God saw me fit to place these lives in my hands.
I didn't plan on getting off on this little tangent, but whatever, it was obviously wanting to get out:) I think I'm just excited about this new precious life under our roof and tonight I even filled out a baby registry just for fun to get more excited about him. He is a miracle and just as God used IGN to open my eyes to so much, He is already using this little guy to make me more and more aware of His goodness. I am thankful.